Sunday, May 24, 2009


I'm finding it's way too easy for me to curl up in my shell and just shuffle through life alone, and I hate that. I love people, and I have an honest need for them, but at the same time I often find myself trapped in my fears of being unacceptable and unloved that I sometimes physically stop myself from being with people. 

Why do I do this? I'm only just scratching the surface in realizing that this is what I've been doing to myself. The psychosis must run much deeper, but I haven't gotten there yet.

Why am I telling you this? Because I want someone to know, and I want someone to help me out of it. I can see myself letting life slip by and that scares me more than the things that are stopping me from living fully. I feel paralyzed by this.


annaliese said...

ok. you are coming over for lunch. Thursday. be there (here). love you.

Stephanie. said...

i used to feel this way. it's difficult to pull yourself out but it does sound so simple. changing your mind set and forcing yourself to be uncomfortable sometimes is what will do the trick. try something new.